A Prayer for One Growing Older and a Wise Joke

Lord,
Thou knowest better than I myself
that I am growing older and will someday be old.
Keep me from the fatal habit of thinking
I must say something on every subject and on every occasion.

Release me from craving to
straighten out everybody’s affairs.

Make me thoughtful but not moody;
helpful but not bossy.

With my vast store of wisdom,
it seems a pity not to use it all;
but Thou knowest, Lord,
that I want a few friends at the end.
Keep my mind free from the recital of endless details;
give me wings to get to the point.

Seal my lips on my aches and pains;
they are increasing, and love of rehearsing them
is becoming sweeter as the years go by.

I dare not ask for improved memory,
but for a growing humility and a lessening cock-sureness
when my memory seems to clash with the memories of others.
Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be mistaken.

Keep me reasonably sweet, for a sour old person
is one of the crowning works of the devil.
Give me the ability to see good things in unexpected places
and talents in unexpected people;
and give, O Lord, the grace to tell them so.
Amen.

What Others Think of Me

Two seniors citizens were talking about
the wisdom and humility that comes with age.
One volunteered,
“When I was young I was very proud. My pride caused me more worry!
I was constantly worrying about what other people thought about me.
When I got older and wiser,
I said to myself, “I don’t care what they think about me.”
And now that I’m even older and
I realize they weren’t thinking about me at all.

[Funny Times is a humor magazine with cartoons and columnists that make you laugh, moan, scream and cry. They are kind enough to allow me to reprint the occasional cartoon. Of course, humor — like beauty — is often in the eye or ear of the beholder.]

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About Paul Wharton

I am a cradle Catholic, a native West Virginian, and a priest since April 24, 1982. Spiritual Direction has made a tremendous difference in my life and I encourage people to try it out. My motto is "Progress not perfection." I am grateful that God has done for me what I could not do for myself.
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